Life measured in lemons

So I've heard many variations of the old "when life gives you lemons" adage. It seems to me that all of us can base at least a smidgen of our makeup on which way we choose to interpret the old saying. I personally have found 3 favorites that stick out to me. 3 that best describe the different ways we deal with life.

Make lemonade. Ahhh, to be the person that always finds the positive in things. The sun on a cloudy day, the color in a sea of black, the meaning behind the most cryptic of words. You know the people that abide by this version. The ones that inevitably make you want to punch them in the face for their inhuman level of optimism. Sure, lemonade. Sorry, but I'm not made of sugar.






Find a guy with Vodka and throw a party. I'd say about 80% of the human population embraces this philosophy. It presents itself as a fusion of the peaches and fairy dust the Lemonaders are made of and the "screw it" attitude that comes with the ultimate indifference many of us prefer. Sure, these folks can still make the best of the situation. Give me lemons, I'll keep drinking until I'm poluted enough to not give a damn about the sour taste they leave behind. The Partyers take what comes...with a grain of salt.






Say f*ck the lemons and bail. How could this not be a favorite? The Bailers just don't give a sh*t. You can chuck lemons at their heads until there is a pool of sour juice and pulp at their feet, they'll just ignore you. Who wants to deal with a 10lb bag of yellow fruit anyway? Run away! they say. If you ignore it, it will eventually go away. These guys aren't pessimistic, per se, they just can't be bothered to deal with life. If it's not sweet, why put any effort into it? For example, when I began typing this blog this morning. And it sounded a thousand times funnier and more intelligent than this pile of dung. And I hit the clear button twice and it erased the whole damn thing. And I wanted to scream in frustration and throw my phone against the wall. BUT, instead, I said F it. And graced you with this half-assed version instead. Hope you like it. :)